What's worse: this popcorn or this movie?
Dave: So, Sordid Lives, the original movie, has a fond place in my heart. I dearly love Bonnie Bedelia’s giant hair, Sissy frying chicken and popping pills, Leslie Jordan in Tammy Wynette drag, Juanita drunkenly calling the radio station to win Willie Nelson tickets, the too-earnest gay friendly plot, and Latrelle being a no-holes-barred steam engine of a woman and trading obscenities and hair tips with the sassy gay hairdresser. Somehow, the sequel kept all the wooden acting and lazy dialogue of the original and lost the lovely characters that drew so many folks to it in the first place. I’d watch the original movie and the TV series over again, but I think once was more than enough for this one. (⭐️⭐️)
Ow. Ow ow ow. I am no wimp when it comes to heat, but damn!! This popcorn damn near seared off my taste buds. My lips still feel a little tingly. And to top it all off, it called for weird spices we had to work to find and there was just too much of everything. Food Network, I think your recipe testers fell asleep at the wheel on this one. Or maybe their lips were so sore from all the heat that they couldn’t tell you how Mariah Carey-in-Glitter level horrible this recipe was. (⭐️)
Joe: This film is about as subtle as a sledgehammer to the crotch, and just as funny. And only slightly more painful. “Oh, I don’t think you need to be familiar with the show to get it,” Dave assured me. He wasn’t right. But I also don’t think I could sit through an episode of this, either. Sissy & Juanita were a hoot. Whoopi’s cameo was fabulous. Everything else was pretty excruciating. Especially the acting. Lord, is the acting bad. (⭐️1/2)
I was really looking forward to this popcorn. It sounded spicy, and the fragrance that filled the kitchen as I made it was intoxicating. This popcorn was also, by far, the most expensive popcorn we’ve made yet. After all, who keeps Szechuan peppercorns, peanut oil, and arbol chiles on hand in their pantry? And who uses an entire half cup of sesame seeds and aforementioned peppercorns in a single dish? And who the *hell* is on the editorial board at Food Network who green lights ONE HALF CUP of Szechuan peppercorns over 16 cups of popped popcorn. I can take spicy. This? This wasn’t spicy. It was literally eating one handful after another of toasted peppercorns. Which is about as delicious as it sounds. We’ve made disappointing popcorns from this list, but this one, by far, is the worst. The absolute worst. (⭐️)
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